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First step: Don't type in all-caps
Second step: Proofread your messages
Third step: an MBA program will certainly get you an office job that makes 50k a year. You could probably even get one online and there would be a decent job waiting at the end. If you have a college degree and don't have time/money for an MBA, try finding a small consulting firm in healthcare because that business is booming. They might hire an inexperienced person as long as they're smart, aggressive, and willing to travel.